Here’s the No. 1 skill successful people have, says Arnold Schwarzenegger: ‘Most people aren’t so lucky’

Being curious and being a good listener are a big part of how to effectively utilize your relationship with other people in pursuit of your goals.

I don’t mean that in a manipulative way, only practically.

When it comes down to it, people are resources. But it’s only when you learn to soak up what those people tell you — not just let it go in one ear, out the other — that you truly begin to make yourself useful to others and become a resource yourself.

In the gym, if I saw someone trying a new training technique that didn’t make sense to me, I would ask them about it because maybe it would help me. When I saw the great bodybuilder Vince Gironda do the side-lying triceps extension at his gym, for instance, I admit I thought it looked like a little Mickey Mouse with the tiny dumbbell he was using.

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But instead of dismissing it entirely because Vince didn’t come from a heavy lifting background, I tried it. I did 40 sets during my next arms workout, which I had learned was the best way to see how a new movement impacts my body, and my outside triceps shook the whole next day.

The exercise was so effective, I had to ask Vince about it: How did you come up with this exercise? Why does this work better than other similar movements? How should I best incorporate it into a workout?

My questions served multiple purposes. The answers, if they made sense, would alleviate any of my doubts or concerns. By being curious, I showed humility and made myself an ally to Vince, which made it more likely that he might share other valuable training techniques.

But most important of all, asking good “how” and “why” questions about something you’re interested in increases the chances of information sticking in your brain and connecting with other related bits of information — making all of it more useful to you when it’s time to put it…