“Dating truly can feel like a low-key gambling addiction,” says author and comedian Lane Moore in her new dating advice book, “You’re Not the Only One F*cking Up.”
“You don’t eat or sleep,” she writes. “You drink caffeine, and you stay up all night because you’re always playing to win. You don’t stop rolling the dice because something better is coming.”
Moore is very familiar with the pressures of online dating. For nearly a decade, she’s hosted a show called “Tinder Live” where she shares her online profile and allows the audience to vote on whether she swipes right or left.
She talked to WNYC’s Alison Stewart on a recent episode of “All Of It” about dating apps, awkward in-person encounters, red flags, dating fatigue and the societal pressure to find “the One.”
An edited version of their conversation is below.
Stewart: How has the dating app landscape changed in the past 10 years?
Moore: The only way I think it’s changed is that more people know about it and have exhaustion from it. You have people on it now who maybe were married when the apps first came out, and now they’re divorced.
Can you share one thing people should not put on their dating profile?
I genuinely believe that a lot of people don’t know how they’re being perceived. So one of the things that I would advise people is: Don’t yell in your profile. And it might seem like “of course, I’m not gonna yell on my profile!”
But I see yelling in a number of profiles — specifically for men who are like “FIRST OF ALL, NO SINGLE MOMS. DON’T BE UGLY. YOU BETTER SHAVE!”
What is this?! How is this a good foot to start off on? No one’s liking that, Jeff.
So just stop yelling in your profile.
Meeting people in real life was always awkward. It’s sometimes even more awkward now, given that people have been inside for a while. When do you know somebody’s actually flirting with you in real life?
It’s so hard to know because everybody’s different. For me, sometimes people think I’m flirting…
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