Dear Annie:
I’m sure many of your readers have experienced what I am dealing with now, and that is an aging husband who is hard of hearing. He has hearing aids but says they don’t help much. It’s hard to carry on a conversation with him because, as a soft speaker, I really have to exert myself to get him to hear what is being said.
In fact, I have had to undergo speech therapy because of hoarseness and a very strained voice. He has the TV on constantly, and in order to converse with him, we have to turn the volume off. If there is a program he is really interested in, he’ll wear the aids, so you can imagine how I feel that he won’t wear them all the time. I am at my wits’ end. — Tired of Not Being Heard
Dear Tired of Not Being Heard:
I’m sure that your husband is tired of not being able to hear. You are both faced with the challenge of living with his hearing loss. Have compassion for him and for yourself as you adjust to this new reality. Tell him exactly what you told me in this letter — that your feelings are hurt when he puts on his hearing aids for a TV show but not for his wife. Understandably, that is sending you the message that what the television is saying is more important than what you are saying, and that simply is not true. He might not even be aware how hurt or fed up you are until you tell him.
“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].
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