Harvard-trained psychologist: If you use any of these 9 phrases every day, ‘you’re more emotionally secure than most’

Emotionally secure people are empowered, confident and comfortable in their own skin. They walk the world with authenticity and conviction, and do what is meaningful to them.

As a Harvard-trained psychologist, I’ve found that this sense of self-assuredness makes them better able to navigate conflict and be vulnerable with others, mostly because they aren’t looking for external validation.

But takes a lot of work to get there. If you use any of these nine phrases, you’re more emotionally secure than most people:

One of the most noticeable characteristics of emotionally secure people is that they articulate themselves well. They choose their responses carefully and aren’t impulsive in their reactions.

Similar phrases: 

• “I’m really frustrated and need some time to myself. I don’t want to say something I might regret later.”
• “I don’t have an answer right now. Can we revisit this conversation tomorrow?”

Emotionally secure people feel comfortable setting boundaries. They are clear about what they will and will not do based on their own moral principles, needs and desires.

Similar phrases: 

• “I’m sorry, but I can’t help with that because I have too many other commitments.”
• “Thank you for the offer, but that’s not something I enjoy doing.”

They always communicate their needs in a respectful way. This means they state how they feel when someone treats them poorly. If they feel their boundaries are being violated, they’ll take action to make changes.

Similar phrases: 

• “When you say things like that, I feel hurt and angry.”
• “If you treat me like this, I’m going to step away because it’s not healthy for me.”

They are consistent in how they operate in the world. This makes being around them predictable and safe because friends and loved ones know that they are who they say they are.

Similar phrases: 

• “What you see is what you get.”
• “You may not like this…