Dear Abby: I honored stepfather’s dying wish. Now everyone is mad at me.

DEAR ABBY:

In his last days, my stepfather asked that I not tell my brothers, my mom (his ex) and other family members about his cancer. I struggled with it for months. After his passing, the family found out I had known and hadn’t told them, and they blamed me for not telling them. I told them he didn’t want them to know. They said he didn’t mean it. (Oh, yes, he DID!)

The problem with them is they are drama-filled, which is why even I usually don’t deal with them. They called me names, but I was only doing what he specifically asked me to do. How do I deal with this? — SAD STEPSON IN WASHINGTON

DEAR STEPSON:

Your brothers appear to be blaming you because they weren’t as close to their stepfather as they might have been. I will assume that you see them infrequently. If you must see them and the subject comes up, repeat this mantra: “Dad asked me not to say anything. If he’d wanted you to have that information, HE would have told you.” (And that includes your mother.)

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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Good advice for everyone — teens to seniors — is in “The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It.” To order, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $8 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)