DEAR ABBY:
I am a lesbian who has been in a relationship for a year and a half. My partner was with men the majority of her life. One of her last exes is someone she now calls her best friend. She talks with and texts him every day. I now have trust issues with them because of something I saw four months ago.
I love a lot about her, except she’s not very affectionate with me, and I need that. I knew when I was first getting involved with her that he was going to be in her life. They have no children tying them together, but we all go kayaking often. Although I’m not comfortable with it, she has given me no choice if I want to kayak with her. She also hides things from me, like when she buys him gifts.
How do I handle the jealousy I feel for him? I can’t stand to be around him, because I know in my gut there is deception. But I don’t want to lose all the good I have with her. — THREE’S A CROWD IN VIRGINIA
DEAR THREE’S A CROWD:
What does “all the good you have with her” entail? What I gather from your letter is that you have spent a year and a half with someone who is bisexual, whom you don’t completely trust, and who makes you feel like a third wheel.
From where I sit, your jealousy is justified. Three in a relationship is awfully crowded, unless it’s by mutual agreement. If you haven’t talked to her about your feelings, you should. And if you can’t arrive at a resolution, end your suffering and move on.
** ** **
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
** ** **
Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two booklets: “Abby’s Favorite Recipes” and “More Favorite Recipes by Dear Abby.” Send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $16 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are…
Read the full article here
Leave a Reply