Dear Annie: Selfish cousin always talks, rarely listens

Dear Annie:

I have a cousin who I grew up with (literally in the same building) for eight years of my life. After our families moved, we stayed close, often kept in touch on social media or through phone calls and text messages. We’ve often said we were sisters, not cousins.

In recent years I’ve begun to realize how selfish, self-centered and manipulative my cousin is. She will only call if something has happened in her life that she wants to brag about or if she has something to complain about. If I call her, she doesn’t answer.

During our calls, she never allows me to tell her about my life now, and any time I interject something, I’m shot down and told she has to go or she just continues her complaining without skipping a beat.

Annie, I’m tired. I’m tired of feeling like I’m being used. My husband, kids and I made an eight-hour car trip to visit her and some extended family last year. No extended family member has ever asked to come visit us in our new home, not even to come meet my kids. Including her.

Now I get a text every so often about how much she misses me and how we need to plan for her to come visit, but every time I respond with dates when we are available, it’s at least a few months before I hear back from her, if I hear back at all. This last time she only texted me because she saw my father at a family function.

My question is, do I keep entertaining these texts and calls from her even if they are so draining? She has no clue what has been happening in my life for at least five to 10 years (I quit social media after high school) because all she does is talk about herself. I feel like I’m ready to just cut my losses and limit this relationship to a Christmas card every year.

What do you think? — Ready to Move On

Dear Ready to Move On:

Your cousin/“sister’” does seem incapable of being a true friend or being supportive for you right now. The important part in the sentence is “right now.” Next time you see her face-to-face, tell…