Dear Annie:
“Traveling Days Over,” who thought his vacations were over once he and his wife were “empty nesters” and traveling with his wife alone was stressful, has probably never considered his wife a member of the vacation group. I imagine she has done all the work and planning (and cooking and cleaning) on his vacations so he and his children could have a fun, carefree experience. Now that it is only the two of them, she still has all the dog work to do, and he is getting stressed because she can’t live it up with him and still provide the service he expects. I have been there. Unless he is willing to cough up some dough so they both can relax, or pitch in and help, I believe his vacations as he knew them are over.
There is another choice! Reconnect with the girl you married — consider her a playmate instead of a servant! Change like that in an old marriage is hard as people become very territorial and dug in to the way they have always done things, but it is possible! I have been there, too, and I can say the change is well worth it!
I wish them luck. I appreciate your column and your wise and compassionate advice. — Empty Nesters Reconnect
Dear Reconnect:
What a great idea to try to remember the person that you married and rekindle your flame. Being able to change is part of having a better marriage and understanding of each other.
“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].
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