Dear Amy: “Guilty Friend” reported that her friend’s husband had repeatedly sexually harassed her.
Personally, I feel that in the case of sexual harassment women should not be afraid to “rock the boat.” We are autonomous creatures and have nothing to be embarrassed about.
Don’t go run to the wife and tell her what her husband is doing.
Solve the situation yourself by loudly repeating what the perp is saying!
Involve your social environment in that moment.
For example, if this happens during dinner you can loudly say: “I am not interested in your private parts.” Or, “Could you please remove your hand from between my legs?”
It is always a power game. Predators look for weakness and embarrassment. They count on women not calling them out.
I say to embarrass them right back! Not by pulling them aside and being discreet about it, but publicly in the moment!
By doing this, I even managed to get apologies from a four-star general!
– Been There
Dear Been There: I agree that predators are counting on the social conditioning of others to be embarrassed when they are harassed or assaulted.
It would be great if future perpetrators were socially conditioned not to sexually harass people.
I do think that people are becoming more assertive about calling out this behavior, and that’s a good first step.
(You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
©2023 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
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