DEAR ABBY: Eighteen years ago, I married a man so he could get health insurance and have back surgery. It was supposed to be short-lived. He fell in love with me and wouldn’t leave.
He’s put me through hell over the years. Stage 4 tongue cancer left him unable to work, which I didn’t have an issue with. Then he started drinking and got a DUI. Because I was the sole provider, it cost me almost $10,000.
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My husband is a complete SLOB and doesn’t care. He has a severe sleep disorder he refuses to address. Most days, he drinks all night and sleeps until 2 or 3 in the afternoon. I finally moved out, but now he’s pestering me about when I’ll be back. What can I do? — TURNED THE PAGE IN ARIZONA
DEAR TURNED: Unless you want more of the same, DO NOT GO BACK. You have done enough of the heavy lifting. It’s now time to concentrate on what is good for YOU and what will make YOU happy. Because you no longer want to live with this person, consult an attorney about how to extricate yourself from a dysfunctional relationship, which should have ended as soon as he healed from his back surgery.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order “How to Have a Lovely Wedding.” Send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $8 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)
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