Dear Annie: My husband and I were invited to a friend’s house for takeout dinner. I asked what to bring, and she originally said nothing but then said a bottle of wine and a dessert.
When we arrived with the dessert and two bottles of wine, she informed me that she wanted us to pay for our part of the takeout. We have had them over for takeout and never asked them to pay. In the past, when we’ve had dinner at one of our houses, the person doing the inviting provides the main course. I was totally shocked and didn’t know what to say. This really bothers me because we consider them friends. We paid them for the food, but I am really disgusted that they treated us like this. When she invited us for dinner, she should have told me that she wanted us to pay and we could have declined the invitation.
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Any advice you can provide would be appreciated because I don’t know how to handle this. — Shafted by Dinner Date
Dear Shafted: I wholeheartedly agree with you and your husband. If splitting the cost of the meal were that important to your friends, they should’ve informed you beforehand and, in the spirit of fairness, offered to split the expense of the dessert and wines you brought.
The next time they reach out to get together, perhaps you can suggest cooking in, a more economical option, or both of you preparing a few dishes potluck-style. Given how this gathering unfolded, I would imagine it’s likely that history will repeat itself, in which case, it’s understandable to decline future visits entirely.
“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].
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