Dear Annie: Honest worker needs to weigh risks of going to HR

Dear Annie: Before approaching HR or their supervisor concerning their dishonest, underperforming co-worker as you advised, I recommend that “Honest Worker” update their resume and research open positions at other companies in case things go badly. HR departments are consumed by management directives such as hiring qualified employees, benefit and salary administration, managing intern programs, and communication of policy changes; they are unlikely to devote resources to discipline the difficult co-worker. If they do, it will likely make her more difficult to work with.

Similarly, “Honest Worker’s” supervisor is likely well aware of the co-worker’s actions and has chosen not to address it. Pointing out this failure could end badly for “Honest Worker.” Furthermore, anonymity is never a certainty in an office, and difficult co-worker may learn of “Honest Worker’s” conversations with HR and/or their supervisor and inflict the wrath that “Honest Worker” wants to avoid.

A better approach is to continue to work hard, develop working relationships with colleagues, and seek a promotion or lateral transfer in a different department. In the meantime, pray for the difficult co-worker’s healthy early retirement. — Been There

Dear Been There: Thank you for offering your perspective — and I’m sorry that you had to learn the hard way! I agree that, based on the letter from “Honest Worker,” it is quite possible the problem will not be remedied by a conversation with HR or a supervisor. It’s always smart to hope for the best and prepare for the worst, so your suggestion of researching a plan B before “Honest Worker” embarks on their next attempt for office harmony, is eminently sensible. Thanks again.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit